Yes, today is my last day before I return to the grind back to corporate America. As many mothers who work outside of the home, I have very mixed feelings about this. But I will say that this time is much harder. Which is somewhat strange being that it should almost be easier. Easier because I know my kids will be staying home with daddy during the day while I work. Easier knowing that at any point in the day I can make a quick call to see how they are doing. Easier because it's my second time doing this so I've been through it all before.
I think it's harder because for the last 12 weeks, my sweet family of four has enjoyed such blissful quality family time. (yes, there were moments when you wanted some solo time and would surrender) I'll miss being able to share nap time with K and just snuggle all day with O. I'll miss the extra hours of conversation my husband and I squeezed in during the first month when we'd both suffer through the multiple nighttime feedings. Of course, I wish that my leave had started out differently. I would have preferred no NICU time and being able to bring my second son home with us when we left the hospital. It's unfair that his first Christmas was spent sitting in a hospital. But at 12 weeks old, he's amazing. Just as amazing as his older brother. It's amazing how priorities can quickly shift.
I'm lucky, though, at least my transition back to corporate America will begin with the first day in my office at home, just unearthing through too many emails and getting my calendar in order. My boss, so graciously, of course also gave me five things to work on from home that day, too. So I certainly won't really be easing back in, since apparently I should be diving back in. But ... maybe that's better, too. We'll just have to wait and see.
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